neglected like a broken toy
2002-08-29 @ 11:02 p.m.

Le sigh. Life right now is just making me feel so neglected. The majority of my friends have already moved into their dorm rooms, but I'm here until Sunday. They live just right around the corner from me, but it seems like they're too busy for anything, even just a little chat via AIM. I give up. The more I try to approach people, the more they want nothing to do with me. I find that when I don't make the first move with my friends, that they'll eventually call me up and be happy to hang out with me. But when I ask them to do anything, or try to have a conversation, they're always busy or in the middle of something "important". It gets really frustrating after a while. Even during my orientation in June I called my friends to say hi because I was feeling lonely, and they weren't home. I know the world doesn't revolve around me; I know my friends have lives just as I do, but sometimes you can't help but wonder if they are just being jerks sometimes.

Stuff is still not all packed. Better get working on that, right? Err, I have this feeling that everything will still not be packed and ready for Sunday, although I hope that it is. I really don't want to go now, I really want to stay home, even though my friends are really sucking at the moment.

I was watching the MTV music video awards tonight with my mom and sister. What a life, I know. They were pretty entertaining, considering that I hate all of those award shows. I love Shakira, so to see her performance was awesome. They're still on, actually. I like Enrique Iglesias a lot too, but he was with that Anna Kornakovawhore, so I didn't want to look at him.

I'm feeling a little sick and with a headache because I went out today in Boston's Downtown Crossing to get sneakers and a few other things that I needed. It was raining, and even with the aid of an umbrella, I managed to get soaking wet. EEK! So I came home, I had to peel off the clothes and I opted to put on warm and fuzzy lounging stuffs. After that I curled up cozzily on the chair in the living room and watched television with my blanket to keep me warm. But as always when people go out in the rain, I got that sort of fever where your body is pretty cold but your face gets really really hot. I don't know why, but that happens to me when I go out in the rain and it's cold. I still sort of have a headache now, but I'll get over it.

So, I don't know what to do with myself, really. It's an awkward stage in life now. Transitional shit, going from high school to college. I was never really good with coping. Guess now is just the same.

Tchau e boa noite.



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