I am slowly working my way toward Friday night and the Goya. I am going to end up going late because Jackie has to go to a basketball game or something, which is kind of crappy. Still, it's going to be lots of fun...except if it ends up like it was two years ago and everyone else in the whole place is totally fucked up except for me and a few of my friends. I'll still have a good time, just because it will be so good to dance. Still, it makes me think about two years ago again. That was the day that Chris and Carolyn hooked up. I can remember that so clearly...I was so close to asking him to dance, just once, just so I could know what it would feel like to dance with someone who you were infatuated with. No, though...it wasn't meant to be at all, because I was stupid, I chickened out, and I didn't do something that I really wanted to. I spent the night crying at Jackie's because I ended up sleeping over there, and no one really understood. They tried to make me feel better, but I remember the kind of sinking depression that just sets in and sticks with you until you're ready to do something about it and get rid of it. Those were some bad days. I got that kind of emotional crash after the semi too. I can imagine that the crash that occurs coming off of drugs is somewhat like that. Not like I would know, but it just seems like that, from what I've heard. But this Friday is going to be fun, no matter what. I insist it.
I have to decide what I'm going to wear tomorrow. I have to cut down on the snacks I've been eating, or else my clothes aren't going to fit me anymore...*hehe* I don't think it's that bad yet, but you never know what will happen. Maybe if I actually did something active, I wouldn't have such a problem. I have to go to dancing tomorrow; I haven't been going, so maybe that's why I've felt so sluggish lately. Plus, I haven't been getting enough sleep at all. Once I go to bed after ten, it's all over. I need at least a nice steady seven hours to practically function the next day. It's unfortunate, but what can you do? I better prepare for tomorrow and get all of my extra junk done...