running out of creativity
2001-07-13 @ 9:50 p.m.

I went on a shopping spree today! I finally got out of the house and went to the mall for a change. I needed to get something to wear for my senior pictures, because I am going to be getting them taken next Friday. I got a turtleneck sweater, because the guy at the picture place said that those look really nice in photographs. At least I think that's what he said. If he said the opposite, then I'm in trouble. I don't care though. I got a really pretty blue and white sweater from a&f. I actually had money to spend there, which is quite amazing. I need a pair of pants that would look good with it too, because they do take some 3/4 shots. I am so hoping that they'll come out well, because I do not want any ugly memories.

Tomorrow we're going to start watching Cleo for Jessie, Mei, and Becca while they're on vacation. It will be nice to have a pet around the house. I have always wanted one, after all. I seriously think that I ate too much today. Yes, I know that this does not have anything to do with the cat at all, and therefore should not be in the same paragraph, but the thought just struck me, really. I hate the thought of being fat. I don't want to be fat at all. Granted, I am not, but one cannot help but think what will happen if this trend of eating too much continues. It will lead me down a hellish path of scary excercise tapes and puking up food and not eating anything for days on end. Oh, why must I deal with these things?

Joe called tonight and asked me if I wanted to go to the movied. Umm...no? Jesus, I think I have turned him down about five times, and he still does not get it. What a persistant person. I shall never be rid of this problem. I feel so damn awful everytime I tell him that I don't want to go out, or that I'm doing something else, but at the same time I feel in my heart that I truly don't want to go out and am happy that I made the decision to just stay at home and do whatever. I just want to be free of him, free of lying, and free of always having to come up with an excuse. I have tried so much to give hints, and everytime I give in just a tad bit by agreeing to go along somewhere, I get pulled back into the awfulness of it all.

Meow meow...I am downloading the remix of 'Get Your Freak On' by Missy Elliot. Nelly Furtado sings in it, and I think that it is good. You should think that it is good too. Or else I won't like you. j/k I am sick of writting all of this bull, so...

Ciao.

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